Spilled the Beans - Almost

Okay, so today I was out taking care of some banking business and the branch representative chatted about Christmas and shopping. All of the sudden, she asked if I had children. I could feel the yes about to leap from my throat and slip through my lips. But, I was able to catch it before I said it. This is harder than I anticipated. I figure if I can go another week or two without snitching, I will be in the clear to start telling my immediate family. Let's see if I can really keep a secret.

Almost busted!

Okay,

So I went to visit my mother this weekend and my aunt called while I was there. She asked my mother to put me on the phone. As soon as the receiver reached my ear, my aunt blurts out

"Are you pregnant?".

I almost fainted. I am not ready to share my news with them yet. So I took the easy route and lied. I answered "No, why would you ask me that?".

She began to tell me that she'd dreamed of fish the night before. It is a superstition that, in my experience, can be a pretty accurate method for prediction of pregnancy. She began to tell me that there were a pile of them and that there some that were scaled and some that were not. According to my aunt, the mother to be would probably expect twins.

Twins!!! Holy Moly. That was a scary thought. I don't necessary believe that, but just to think of the responsibility that two infants brings is a little daunting.

I plan to call my fetal maternal physician tomorrow to make an appointment. If I make it to twelve weeks, then I will announce my pregnancy. I think this will be an interesting ride.

I Am Pregnant Again!

Okay,

Let me give you a little history. I am a 33 year old newly wed and I am pregnant. This is my fourth pregnancy. Currently, I don't have any children. Two of my pregnancies ended in miscarriage at very early stages. The other ended in a still birth 25 weeks into the pregnancy.

So needless to say, I am a little scared about this pregnancy. I walk between wanting this baby and expecting the pregnancy to end which is a very akward place to be. So to get through this, I've created this blog.

Now don't get me wrong, I have a very supportive husband, family and friends. However, when you get to the stage I am in, you don't want people to begin feeling sorry for you. So you don't talk about your inner most feelings and fears. I don't want to be a bother.

I think this blog we be theraputic and maybe it will reach others that are in a similar situation.

Thanks for embarking on this journey with me.